Three Most Loved Little Words

Owen age 4

This morning I woke up thinking about how people express their love to each other verbally. Three stories were on my mind.

One of them involves our little grandson, Owen. Owen kind of got the short end of the Grandparents' stick when he was an infant and little toddler. He was born just a few months before Hazie. It seems that most of the time we were in Utah during that time was spent in the hospital with Hazie or taking care of Jen and Lowell's kids so they could be with her.

In short, Owen's bonding time with his grandparents was compromised by crisis intervention at his cousins' house. Hazel spent nearly 100 days in the hospital her first year of life. So this beautiful little boy did not see us as much as he would have under normal circumstances. It bothered us greatly but just could not be helped. Consequently he took a long time to let us hold him and get close to him. Why should the poor kid, he barely knew us. I didn't blame him and I sure wasn't going to force it.

Well, this year he has made great strides in realizing who we are and interacting with us since he is talking so much more now, etc. While I was in Utah last week he came charging at me on the run like only little boys can, threw his arms around my legs and said, "I love you Gramma!" Those three most loved little words made me feel so happy and relieved that he does indeed love me too! What a sweet little heart print. A Kodak moment...click!
The second story is about a woman we knew that wasn't the best, most loving wife in the world. She was often super critical of her nice husband and demeaning towards him in public. He was most humble and always kind in return, but to no avail. One day without any warning he died. The woman said in her total shock and dismay, "If I could just talk to him one more time!" In that moment I wonder would she had said those three most loved little words "I Love You" that I can only imagine where not part of her everyday conversations with him? Ah, what a great teaching moment and it left a definite heart print...click.

The third story is about an old man we use to know and loved dearly. He decided early in his life that he would never say those three most loved little words to anyone except his bride. The old man never found her. He lived out his life a lonely hermit with only a hand full of friends. Through unusual circumstances we met him. Our family grew to love him so and he loved us like his kids and grandkids, but he never could bring himself to say those three most loved little words to anyone. He died alone, in an unremarkable hospital room some place. That definitely left a sad heart print with me. It was days before his handful of friends, mostly our family, even knew he was dead. Not a happy Kodak moment but, it left a big impression on me....click.

I am a firm believer is loving people and letting them know they are loved. Are you? In our family we share our love verbally every day and so there is no doubt in anyone's mind that they are loved and loveable. To me this is just a basic need we all have. I often wonder why people hold these kinds of positive affirmations back from people they care about and love? I don't buy that repetition diminishes the meaningfulness of it.

Maybe one of the reasons is there are too many definitions of the word love and people are afraid one type of love may be mistaken for another. I don't know?? But to me love is a verb and part of the 'action' of that is verbalizing it. Maybe part of it is people are afraid it won't be reciprocated. That is OK though, really it is. Love is something you give, not just something you get.

Anyway, just some thoughts for today. And by the way, if you are reading this then you are my friend and I love you! In my heart, love is a very big piece of friendship.