Sleepless Nights

Sleepiness Nights

I am awake. I'm not really sure why.

I have this sense of urgency. 

That if I sleep I will be missing something. 

It's like there are only so many days,

hours and minutes left to do so much. 

I remember when the kids were little

I'd hold on to every quiet moment. 

When I could just be. 

When no one needed anything. 

When I could just think in uninterrupted sentences.

Savoring the silence or some favorite music...

The perfect backdrop for those few moments each day 

When I could think my own thoughts and be by myself. 

I am a day dreamer caught up in the busyness of most days. 

I love these moments to think, ponder and reflect...

But I long to be a night dreamer sometimes too!  

Sleep eludes as these thoughts intrude. 

And I'm awake and I'm not sure why...  

But in these hours I ponder things that cannot be given voice

But can only be felt and understood when I am here. 

In the safety net of my solitude. 

I am awake and I guess I do know why after all. 

Auto pilot only works for so long. 

The clamor of daily life must be silenced now and then 

And I wonder if you are awake right now too.

And like me you are...

Just trying to catch up with your authentic, creative self 

And taking a deeply satisfying breath because it feels so good. 

Perhaps you also like to find that little space too

Between awake and asleep when you are

Just being, more than doing.

(BJM-Penned one sleepless night this week!)