Showing posts with label Mother's Day. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mother's Day. Show all posts

Sunday, May 11, 2014

Happy Mother's Day


Mother's Day as we know it is 100 years old this year. But the celebration of the goodness mothers is eternal. Whether you are a mother or love someone that is, this is a special day to contemplate the blessings of the human family and all of our mothers since Eve that brought us to this place.

The painting by Pino is one I love. It is called Sacred Steps. It evokes such ethereal, elevated, and eternal feeling and thoughts of the sacred calling of motherhood. The painting depicts the memories of raising children to me, perhaps more than the actual day to day sacred steps to the empty nest. 

As I watch our daughters, which of course includes Chris' wife, Missy, go through this process now through the eyes of my own experiences, I am enthralled all the more by the sacred steps taken to redesign and refine who a woman becomes day by day on the journey. Being a mother is a sanctifying endeavor.  The joys lift you so high while the total sacrifice of your complete self in the process, seals you to it. To love a child in that way is to fill the measure of our creation as women like nothing else I know.  Of course these relationships are eternal.

There are no perfect mothers but there are legions of mothers with hearts full of perfect intentions. Those mothers who want the very best for their children and who sacrifice and give and serve constantly, day after day and year after year in an eternal way. There are no releases in this calling of motherhood.  They are just as important to our lives, out of the nest, as in it. We still worry and fret and yearn for their burdens to be lightened or their shoulders strengthened to carry their load. And also for a way to help them, as their mothers, in those daily struggles.

We still drop everything to run to them in times of need, all of us in our own unique ways. Although our bodies may get weary, we still desire to lift and pull and pray and give to edify and love and support them.  Because that is what Mothers do, without even thinking about it.  The polishing comes from the day in and day out, thick and thin of it, until it becomes who we truly are.   I will always remember my sweet mother sitting in her wheelchair in her 80s, offering to help lift my burdens as I scurried around doing things.  Her body was weakened but her heart and love untamed and as strong as ever.  Motherhood is a miracle.


No joy is as profound to a mother as the happiness and successes of her child.  No mother wants anything negative to befall her children.  No matter what they do or who they become we love them completely.  We love them all equally which is to say unconditionally.

This holiday means more to me each year as I learn of the sacrifices of my own individual foremothers.  They had been women that have been valiant in their stewardship of motherhood through the centuries.   Motherhood was not easy then, as it is not easy today.  We've had different trials but equally challenging in many ways. This world will never be trouble free but their sacrifices have benefited us through the ages.  A child is the only one who hears its mothers heartbeat from the inside and that heartbeat echoes within us all of our lives...passing on something of substance from each generation to the next.  No matter where our mother is, she is never far from us.

In our family they have been women who packed up and shipped out of England and Sweden and Wales and Italy to keep their children from starving to death, in some cases, and from little possibility of improving their lots in life while remaining in their homelands.  They are women who crossed the plains in fear and deprivation but with great faith in a brighter future because of it. Every generation tells of their abundant faith in God to see them through.  This is a sacred heritage that I have seen back to the 1500s.  Not a non-believer in the bunch so far.  The study of these, our people, through the centuries has strengthened and fortified my faith in countless ways.

They have experienced hardships and poverty and dangers and dying children in almost every generation, sometimes more than one or two at a time.  They have been uprooted and they have survived childbirth on the prairies and in sailing ships crossing the ocean with no privacy and no cleanliness and and often under insufferable, horrific conditions.  There was starvation and illnesses and sorrows of every kind while they pressed forward with a perfect brightness of hope in the future, for their children and ultimately for us their posterity.

To learn of them is humbling and enlightening to say the very least.  Being a mom has never been easy, not ever.  But what a tremendous blessing to have a mother and to be one or to love one or many.  There is no more sacred or important thing we can do in this life than to help our Heavenly Father's children through the joys and sorrow of this life.  What a trust He must have in us, His daughters.

And in our husbands and the fathers of our children, who have an equal but different responsibility in this great work.  What a perfect plan of happiness and joy we are given.  All of us are blessed with having or being a mother.  Some of us are both.  But not all.  To all women everywhere that help by being teachers and nurturers and who love children~God bless you. And to all men everywhere the same blessings to you for doing likewise.  And that includes all Grandparents and even some Great-Grandparents who have had the glorious privilege of seeing His Plan of Happiness play out into the third and fourth generations as well.  Our loving Heavenly Father has thought of everything!  Find and cling to the Joy in it!

Monday, May 5, 2014

My Mom and Apple Pie

With Mother's Day coming up I have been thinking a lot about my precious Mom.  My Mom was the Queen of Apple Pie baking.  She was well-known for her scrumptious apple pies.  Seriously, nearly famous.  I have never tasted an apple pie that even came close.  I don't know what was so magical about her pies but they just seemed to say "I love you!"  They were simply unforgettable.


She was a beauty inside and out!
Don't you think?
These were her beautician days when
Finger waves were all the rage...


I looked at a lot of images to find a pie that 
looked like Mom's but none were exactly like hers.

Mom and Dad always made the pies together with the help of us kids.  They bought a huge sub-zero freezer for the garage and many years we would get lugs of apples and over the weekend we'd make 52 pies.  One for each week of the year.  There were apple peelings all over the place and everything was sticky as we all peeled and generally made a giant mess in the process. I can still remember the apple juice running down my arms and trying to pare the peeling off in one long strip.  I didn't mind the slicing but I didn't love the coring.  But a good bath at the end of the long hot sticky days and the satisfaction of seeing those pies frozen one layer at a time, and stacked in the freezer was amazing.

Mama would always wear a pretty apron even when she was doing this kind of work, she was lovely and such a classy lady to the end. And the fact that Daddy helped her was a heart print for me and a really cool memory now.  I can still see him in his white grampa t-shirt and his suspenders on those hot days in Sacramento working in the kitchen.  It made me want to marry a man just like him.  And I did.

 Working together as a family was very strengthening to us.  Mom gave away a lot of those pies so there really wasn't one for every week and that was fine.  It was a great learning experience in so many ways.  I am definitely going to try this again and get good at it.  It is about so much more than the pie.

This week I have been scanning old papers, documents, photos and even a few recipes.  I was pretty good at saving things like this when I was a young woman, never fully realizing what they would mean to me now.




Mom's recipe in her own handwriting~
priceless to me now!

I found another card written in my handwriting and
 thought maybe someday our posterity might
 like to see it in my writing.
Mom was not kidding on hers
when she said,
"All generous measurements!"




The Apples are Pippins

Or Gravensteins
Tart crispy green apples are the best for pies.
After assembling all the ingredients...


On top of the bottom crust, add a large, heaping,
 round mound of apples and 
sugar mixture and butter.

Add the top crust and pinch closed around the edges.
Poke the top with a fork for air vents.
Sprinkle a little sugar and cinnamon on the top crust.

Bake at 400 degrees for 15 minutes and then turn 
down the oven to 350 for 55 minutes.
Cool and enjoy!

Thin slices promote even baking
For the Crust:

Flour, Crisco, Salt and Water
Although some people do,
Mom did not use any butter in her crust~
Just Crisco for a light and flaky texture.
The butter went into the pie filling.


For the Pie Filling:

Here's Everything you need!
Apples, Flour, Sugar, Cinnamon,
Salt, Nutmeg, Butter and of course 
a little Water.


So as you can see there was nothing extraordinary about the ingredients or the way the pies were made.  This is just a little slice of life with my Mom.  I think the magic in the pies was simply my Mom's touch.  Or maybe it was that old beat up 1/4 cup tin measurer that did it.  I have it around here someplace I'll have to dig it up and see it if helps!  But neither my Mom nor I were ever very good at exact measurements.  You can tell that by the slight variation in her measurements between her original recipe and the one she dictated to me as she was making a pie years later.  She varied the recipe until it was pure perfection. She just have a sense for how much to use, I guess.  The most important ingredient is the love. And a lot of it.  That I know for sure.

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Happy Mother's Day To Every Woman!


We are in Rhode Island and spending the day with our beautiful daughter, Laura, and her family.  What a joyful time to be with them.  At the end of our trip we are going to Utah to see the rest of the grandkids and our own kids.  What more could any mom hope for than precious time with each of them?  Life is good, really really good.

Here is my Pinterest Board Collection for Mother's Day~ I hope you will enjoy it.  Have a wonderful day, think of your mothers and those that went before them, your own children if you have them and then just think of all the lovely children in your life, no matter what your circumstance, and know that you have  touched many lives for good with your sweet, nurturing, God-given nature as a woman....mother or not.  You are loved by God and many others!

http://pinterest.com/onedesigner/mother-s-day/

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Happy Mother's Day 2012


A Very Happy Mother's Day to one and all! Most women I have known, whether a mother or not, are to be celebrated for their bounteous, nurturing qualities. The love and joy that women bring into this world shapes and molds it like no other human force for good. Literally, the hands that rock the cradle bless us all.

Being loved unconditionally by my own mother was a very sacred experience, one like I have never known the likes of, until we had children of our own. I think most mothers would do anything for our children and in some cases have. Being mom to Jennifer, Christopher and Laura has been a priceless gift that never wears out or grows common place for me. They have taught me so much and given me so much love and respect and comfort through this life and I am grateful for them and their goodness.  And being a Gramma just cannot be surpassed in any possible way! We adore them, each and every one!

 
My Mom, Love Her Forever!

They make every Mother's Day a Happy one for me. And now watching them raise their little families is even more thrilling. They work so hard and I feel exhausted just watching it.

I love you guys and your Dad for the many happy, happy years you can given me. You just keep getting better and better ~ you amaze us constantly.

Jen, Missy and Laura~Happy Mother's Day! You are the best!

I made a Pinterest Board for Mother's Day and you can find it here

Saturday, May 12, 2012

Thoughts on Motherhood


Long stemmed Roses from Jennifer and family this year!  Thank You!

Happy Mother's Day!

I gave this talk on Motherhood last year at church. This is something we do in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. We get opportunities every once in a while to teach each other from the scriptures, our experiences, and to talk about our testimonies of how God's principles apply in and affect our lives. It is not necessarily an easy thing to do, but it truly is a growing experience and brings you closer to the spirit. So the following is the presentation I will give in church today...

*********
I have enjoyed preparing this talk about motherhood. I have thought deeply about this, it is one of my most favorite subjects. It is a privilege to be given the opportunity to focus on just one thing for several days. I am admittedly a bit of a Pollyanna when it comes to motherhood. I love looking on the bright side of it. I believe as the Proclamation on the Family states that:

"Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. "Children are an heritage of the Lord" (Psalms 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe the commandments of God and to be law-abiding citizens wherever they live.

Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.
The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity.

Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.

By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. "

 
I believe in these principals and think that this proclamation sets out the very best way that family life can thrive. It is how parenthood, as well as, marriage can work best. By recognizing that Motherhood is enhanced in every way by a loving father to share equally in the calling of parenting, should make Mother's Day enjoyable to mothers and fathers alike. Father's Day as well, should really be celebrated as a joint effort in accomplishing God's work with his children entrusted to our care. I like that the obligation of these sacred responsibilities and helping one another as equal partners, truly is God's Plan.

So today is Mother's Day, the day we celebrate all the joys of being mothers and of having mothers. I am all for it, aren't you?

I know that Mother's Day can be a bittersweet day for many, if not all of us. I do not think anyone would deny that the love between parent and child is most unique among all other relationships. It has the power given to us to know charity, or the pure love of Christ like no other. No matter the circumstances, it is nearly impossible to put out the light of love between parent and child. For me this day is bittersweet because I love my mother with all my heart and she has passed from this life and I miss her today...and everyday.

Also in the same manner I love all of our children and our grandchildren and we are not together today either. But I can celebrate Mother's Day with Jim. He was every bit as much a part of raising them as I was. And who knows of and shares in my joy in motherhood more than he does?

For many there are sorrows associated with this day, loss of a mother or child in death, sorrow over things not being as we would wish with a certain child or mother, estrangement, or not having opportunity to receive the blessing of being a parent at all in this life. If you or someone you know struggles with this please read or refer them to this article by Sister Sheri Dew, entitled "Are We Not all Mothers?"

So when these unsettling types of feelings arise on Mother's Day, how can we best handle them?

One thing I have learned in my life is that thoughts precede and produce feelings and feelings govern our well-being. "As a man thinketh in his heart so is he," the Bible tells us in Proverbs 23:7. The gift of agency allows us to choose how we feel on Mother's Day and every other day. When I feel myself feeling sadly about not being with my mom and our kids today..I get to choose what I think about next.

I choose to think of God's promise of eternal families and that I will be with my mother again one day. And I can think about my gratitude that our children are where they are supposed to be, doing what they are supposed to be doing, and then I am happy. Then I think of all the blessings they have brought to our lives and I feel joy. One of the secrets to a happy life is gratitude. You simply cannot be grateful and unhappy at the same time.

So on motherhood, I can only share my subjective feelings. My experiences are difference than yours. If I had to think of one word to sum up what my mothering experiences have given me beyond love or joy, it would be "Enrichment."

Have you ever added up the accumulative parenting and grandparenting years you have so far? It is quite astonishing to know that number. For Jim and me it is, 189 years. Seriously scary isn't it?

Have these kids been perfect? Not hardly. Have we been perfect in our parenting and grandparenting...far from it. But do we love them unconditionally and wholeheartedly and think they are the best kids in the whole world...absolutely. Parenthood is not about perfection it is about building a child, a life, and adopting and teaching a value system in a way that allows them the most advantage and opportunity in this life and the next. They are our best people. That is how we feel...


And you should feel exactly the same way
about your own family!

The width and breath of the experiences we have had as parents could not be gained any other way. The highs and lows, the hard knocks and the blows of disappointment, along with the triumphs and joys, are priceless enrichment in a mother and father's life. In the total scheme of things, I think children teach far more to parents than the other way around. We serve and teach them with all of our hearts and they then teach and serve us...it is the perfect circle of life.

There are so many important stages in raising a family. When I see young mothers I am in awe. When I see how hard you work I cannot even imagine that I too once did all of that. If you don't believe in ministering angels, you should they are all about you helping and lifting you when you think you can't do it another day...another minute.

In those years I barely remember what happened between 1972 and 1990. For example I could not name one record on the top 10 charts during that time and I love music. I was pretty much absent from the world, down in the trenches, just running and serving and caring for our family. I'd get through each day and fall exhausted into bed when I couldn't do any more. Then I'd get up the next morning and repeat.

For those of you in that stage right now, I want to assure you that although you will never be released of your calling as mother, you will see the day when you remember what actually happened a week ago, and what it is like not to be dragging all the time.

When that bitter sweet day comes and your last one flies out of the nest, you will grief the loss of it even though it is hard to imagine now. You will long for the days when you had them surrounding you at home. A word of warning about that recapturing of your memory and energy...it doesn't last too long so enjoy it while you can. It is one of the joys of the Empty Nest.

We teach and we pray for our little children continually to be protected from the perils of this crazy world and we worry. If you are holding on to that notion that age 18 is magical, and then your struggles will be over~think again. You always have concern for your boys and girls and pray for them no matter how old they are.

There are so many help books to read about the whole process of parenting. But to me it boils down to a few important things.

I use to love to read books by Richard Eyre and his wife Linda on raising kids. In fact, I still read their books. Parenting Adult Children lies on our bookshelf at home today. Richard Eyre is the originator of The Joy Schools, if you are familiar with them.

He has a new book about Parenting as God Does.
So why not simplify and look to the best parent of all for our mentoring? God our Father.We can begin by remembering who our children really are and to help them remember too. They are our spiritual brothers and sisters and sons and daughters of a King! (This article by the Eyres is amazing and gives you some practical helps on how to do this.)

Examining How God Parents



"So here is a list of some of the things we know about how God, our Heavenly Father parents us.
  1. Complete, unconditional love. We know that God has a deep and unconditional love for each of us and that His love is individual rather than collective.
  1. God sees (and treats) each child as a unique and eternal individual.  He knows each of us perfectly and loves the uniqueness that makes us each who we are.
  1. God gives clear, simple laws with well-announced consequences, rewards, and punishments.   Our Heavenly Father has never been subtle or ambiguous about His rules. He wrote them in stone.
  1. God allows His children the chance to repent. Heavenly Father wants none of us to fail. His laws are not negotiable, and He knows we will fall short, so there is a provision for repentance.
  1. God taught us and trained us and held us close throughout the pre-mortal life; and then He gave us choices and let us go.    God, in His marvelous model for parenting, held us close, kept us with Him in his home, and taught us all He could for eons. And then, when further progress required the responsibility, choice-making, independence and families-of-our-own that could not happen in His presence, He gave us our agency and let us go.
  2. ( I want to add here that when that time comes and they are gone realize, that your job as parents of adult children changes. We should love, support and give our two cents worth only when asked.) Still working on this one!
  1. God allows us constant availability to Him through prayer, and suggests regular communication. With God, there are certain set times when we anticipate spiritual communication--when we partake of the sacrament, when we kneel in family prayer, when we have our personal bedtime prayers. These are like set appointments for spiritual meetings that will keep us in tune and in touch.
  1. God finds joy in his children and in His relationship with them. This one we are good at!
God’s “glory” is the progress and eternal lives of His children, and “joy” is the purpose for which He made mortality. We know that he takes joy in our progress, in our learning, and in His individual relationship with each of us." Article here.
I would like to add a couple of ours to the list.

1. Teach them how to work and work hard. Everything we attain to in this life comes from hard work and lots of it. Sending a young adult out into the world without this skill, only comes back to bite you in the end. And coddling them along in their youth and doing everything for them is not doing them any favors in the long run.

2. Help them to love and support each other and be best friends. You do your best to be the glue that holds your family together when your children are grown. It takes work on your part, they are busy raising their own families, they love their siblings very much, they just don't have a lot of extra time and energy during this time in their lives to stay as connected as they would like.


*************

I love being a mother with all my heart and our family is what I live for, day in and day out. It helps me realize and fulfill the measure of my creation. It is ongoing and I try to never let it become ordinary or to forget what a blessing it is in all its aspects. From the heights of its joy to the depth of its sorrows, it is all good. It is an enrichment of our life experiences and teaches us to be more like Christ, like nothing else can. And when we think it cannot possibly get any better, the crowning glory of life comes along, being a grandparent. There is so much to be thankful for and family is at the top of the list. It is my prayer for all of us that that is where we will be our best selves. Charity, or the Pure Love of Christ, truly does begin at home.

Don't we all want it said of us one day ...that we had these traits from Proverbs 31 about a virtuous woman:


 25Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.
26She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
27She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
28Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. My personal favorite!
29Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.
30Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.
31Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.
It is a life time pursuit for us as women. We need to have faith, pray often, follow our perfect exemplar and mentor, our Father in Heaven, and keep trying. Parenting is like filling our lamp with oil. Little by little, day by day we build our children with the things we say and do and the unconditional love we give them. It is humbling to realize how much faith our Father In Heaven has in us. It is my testimony that, one day at a time we can do it with His help.
***************

P.S. Happy Mother's Day Everyone, and to our sweet and precious daughters, Jen, Laura and Melissa this is your Mother's Day message from me. I love you with all of my heart and soul! You make me smile all the time. And that goes for the Chris, Robert and Lowell as well, and all the kids! As far as I'm concerned, every day is Mother's Day because I have all of you! So since I got absolutely no rest whatsoever today, just for the record...I am taking tomorrow off!
♥ ♥ ♥ and flowers to you all ~ Mom

Sunday, May 8, 2011

On Motherhood


Happy Mother's Day!

I am giving a talk in church today on Motherhood. This is something we do in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. We get opportunities every once in a while to teach each other from the scriptures, our experiences, and to talk about our testimonies of how God's principles apply in and affect our lives. It is not necessarily an easy thing to do, but it truly is a growing experience and brings you closer to the spirit. So the following is the presentation I will give in church today...

*********
I have enjoyed preparing this talk about motherhood for today. I have thought deeply about this, it is one of my most favorite subjects. It is a privilege to be given the opportunity to focus on just one thing for several days. I am admittedly a bit of a Pollyanna when it comes to motherhood. I love looking on the bright side of it. I believe as the Proclamation on the Family states that:

"Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. "Children are an heritage of the Lord" (Psalms 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe the commandments of God and to be law-abiding citizens wherever they live.

Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.
The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity.

Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.

By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. "

I believe in these principals and think that this proclamation sets out the very best way that family life can thrive. It is how parenthood, as well as, marriage can work best. By recognizing that Motherhood is enhanced in every way by a loving father to share equally in the calling of parenting, should make Mother's Day enjoyable to mothers and fathers alike. Father's Day as well, should really be celebrated as a joint effort in accomplishing God's work with his children entrusted to our care. I like that the obligation of these sacred responsibilities and helping one another as equal partners, truly is God's Plan.

So today is Mother's Day, the day we celebrate all the joys of being mothers and of having mothers. I am all for it, aren't you?

I know that Mother's Day can be a bittersweet day for many, if not all of us. I do not think anyone would deny that the love between parent and child is most unique among all other relationships. It has the power given to us to know charity, or the pure love of Christ like no other. No matter the circumstances, it is nearly impossible to put out the light of love between parent and child. For me this day is bittersweet because I love my mother with all my heart and she has passed from this life and I miss her today...and everyday.

Also in the same manner I love all of our children and our grandchildren and we are not together today either. But I can celebrate Mother's Day with Jim. He was every bit as much a part of raising them as I was. And who knows of and shares in my joy in motherhood more than he does?

For many there are sorrows associated with this day, loss of a mother or child in death, sorrow over things not being as we would wish with a certain child or mother, estrangement, or not having opportunity to receive the blessing of being a parent at all in this life. If you or someone you know struggles with this please read or refer them to this article by Sister Sheri Dew, entitled "Are We Not all Mothers?"

So when these unsettling types of feelings arise on Mother's Day, how can we best handle them?

One thing I have learned in my life is that thoughts precede and produce feelings and feelings govern our well-being. "As a man thinketh in his heart so is he," the Bible tells us in Proverbs 23:7. The gift of agency allows us to choose how we feel on Mother's Day and every other day. When I feel myself feeling sadly about not being with my mom and our kids today..I get to choose what I think about next.

I choose to think of God's promise of eternal families and that I will be with my mother again one day. And I can think about my gratitude that our children are where they are supposed to be, doing what they are supposed to be doing, and then I am happy. Then I think of all the blessings they have brought to our lives and I feel joy. One of the secrets to a happy life is gratitude. You simply cannot be grateful and unhappy at the same time.

So on motherhood, I can only share my subjective feelings. My experiences are difference than yours. If I had to think of one word to sum up what my mothering experiences have given me beyond love or joy, it would be "Enrichment."

Have you ever added up the accumulative parenting and grandparenting years you have so far? It is quite astonishing to know that number. For Jim and me it is, 189 years. Seriously scary isn't it?

Have these kids been perfect? Not hardly. Have we been perfect in our parenting and grandparenting...far from it. But do we love them unconditionally and wholeheartedly and think they are the best kids in the whole world...absolutely. Parenthood is not about perfection it is about building a child, a life, and adopting and teaching a value system in a way that allows them the most advantage and opportunity in this life and the next. They are our best people. That is how we feel...

And you should feel exactly the same way
about your own family!

The width and breath of the experiences we have had as parents could not be gained any other way. The highs and lows, the hard knocks and the blows of disappointment, along with the triumphs and joys, are priceless enrichment in a mother and father's life. In the total scheme of things, I think children teach far more to parents than the other way around. We serve and teach them with all of our hearts and they then teach and serve us...it is the perfect circle of life.

There are so many important stages in raising a family. When I see young mothers I am in awe. When I see how hard you work I cannot even imagine that I too once did all of that. If you don't believe in ministering angels, you should they are all about you helping and lifting you when you think you can't do it another day...another minute.

In those years I barely remember what happened between 1972 and 1990. For example I could not name one record on the top 10 charts during that time and I love music. I was pretty much absent from the world, down in the trenches, just running and serving and caring for our family. I'd get through each day and fall exhausted into bed when I couldn't do any more. Then I'd get up the next morning and repeat.

For those of you in that stage right now, I want to assure you that although you will never be released of your calling as mother, you will see the day when you remember what actually happened a week ago, and what it is like not to be dragging all the time.

When that bitter sweet day comes and your last one flies out of the nest, you will grief the loss of it even though it is hard to imagine now. You will long for the days when you had them surrounding you at home. A word of warning about that recapturing of your memory and energy...it doesn't last too long so enjoy it while you can. It is one of the joys of the Empty Nest.

We teach and we pray for our little children continually to be protected from the perils of this crazy world and we worry. If you are holding on to that notion that age 18 is magical, and then your struggles will be over~think again. You always have concern for your boys and girls and pray for them no matter how old they are.

There are so many help books to read about the whole process of parenting. But to me it boils down to a few important things.

I use to love to read books by Richard Eyre and his wife Linda on raising kids. In fact, I still read their books. Parenting Adult Children lies on our bookshelf at home today. Richard Eyre is the originator of The Joy Schools, if you are familiar with them.

He has a new book about Parenting as God Does.
So why not simplify and look to the best parent of all for our mentoring? God our Father.
We can begin by remembering who our children really are and to help them remember too. They are our spiritual brothers and sisters and sons and daughters of a King! (This article by the Eyres is amazing and gives you some practical helps on how to do this.)
Examining How God Parents

"So here is a list of some of the things we know about how God, our Heavenly Father parents us.
  1. Complete, unconditional love. We know that God has a deep and unconditional love for each of us and that His love is individual rather than collective.
  1. God sees (and treats) each child as a unique and eternal individual. He knows each of us perfectly and loves the uniqueness that makes us each who we are.
  1. God gives clear, simple laws with well-announced consequences, rewards, and punishments. Our Heavenly Father has never been subtle or ambiguous about His rules. He wrote them in stone.
  1. God allows His children the chance to repent. Heavenly Father wants none of us to fail. His laws are not negotiable, and He knows we will fall short, so there is a provision for repentance.
  1. God taught us and trained us and held us close throughout the pre-mortal life; and then He gave us choices and let us go. God, in His marvelous model for parenting, held us close, kept us with Him in his home, and taught us all He could for eons. And then, when further progress required the responsibility, choice-making, independence and families-of-our-own that could not happen in His presence, He gave us our agency and let us go.
  2. ( I want to add here that when that time comes and they are gone realize, that your job as parents of adult children changes. We should love, support and give our two cents worth only when asked.) Still working on this one!
  1. God allows us constant availability to Him through prayer, and suggests regular communication. With God, there are certain set times when we anticipate spiritual communication--when we partake of the sacrament, when we kneel in family prayer, when we have our personal bedtime prayers. These are like set appointments for spiritual meetings that will keep us in tune and in touch.
  1. God finds joy in his children and in His relationship with them. This one we are good at!
God’s “glory” is the progress and eternal lives of His children, and “joy” is the purpose for which He made mortality. We know that he takes joy in our progress, in our learning, and in His individual relationship with each of us." Article here.
I would like to add a couple of ours to the list.

1. Teach them how to work and work hard. Everything we attain to in this life comes from hard work and lots of it. Sending a young adult out into the world without this skill, only comes back to bite you in the end. And coddling them along in their youth and doing everything for them is not doing them any favors in the long run.

2. Help them to love and support each other and be best friends. You do your best to be the glue that holds your family together when your children are grown. It takes work on your part, they are busy raising their own families, they love their siblings very much, they just don't have a lot of extra time and energy during this time in their lives to stay as connected as they would like.

*************

I love being a mother with all my heart and our family is what I live for, day in and day out. It helps me realize and fulfill the measure of my creation. It is ongoing and I try to never let it become ordinary or to forget what a blessing it is in all its aspects. From the heights of its joy to the depth of its sorrows, it is all good. It is an enrichment of our life experiences and teaches us to be more like Christ, like nothing else can. And when we think it cannot possibly get any better, the crowning glory of life comes along, being a grandparent. There is so much to be thankful for and family is at the top of the list. It is my prayer for all of us that that is where we will be our best selves. Charity, or the Pure Love of Christ, truly does begin at home.

Don't we all want it said of us one day ...that we had these traits from Proverbs 31 about a virtuous woman:
25Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.
26She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
27She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
28Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. My personal favorite!
29Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.
30Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.
31Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.

It is a life time pursuit for us as women. We need to have faith, pray often, follow our perfect exemplar and mentor, our Father in Heaven, and keep trying. Parenting is like filling our lamp with oil. Little by little, day by day we build our children with the things we say and do and the unconditional love we give them. It is humbling to realize how much faith our Father In Heaven has in us. It is my testimony that, one day at a time we can do it with His help.

***************


Please forgive the insufferable length of this post.

P.S. Happy Mother's Day Everyone, and to our sweet and precious daughters, Jen, Laura and Melissa this is your Mother's Day message from me. I love you with all of my heart and soul! You make me smile all the time. And that goes for the Chris, Robert and Lowell as well, and all the kids! As far as I'm concerned, every day is Mother's Day because I have all of you! So since I got absolutely no rest whatsoever today, just for the record...I am taking tomorrow off!
♥ ♥ ♥ and flowers to you all ~ Mom

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Mother's Day Eve

I woke up feeling really blue this morning which is a very rare thing for me. I was thinking about Mother's Day. Thoughts of my mom who passed away six years ago and our kids hundreds and thousands of miles away and before I knew it I was brushing away the tears. It felt good in a weird sort of way to think of them, and mourn the loss of having them near and to realize how very important they are to me and how much I miss them.

It made me so thankful for our eternal family relationships, but I still felt empty and alone in the here and now of it. I knew it was because I was thinking about how much I missed them all. I know that thoughts always precede feelings so I decided to try to kick it by thinking different thoughts.

This is what I thought about instead...

1. I am cooking dinner for Jim and his mom tomorrow and I'm going to be thankful that he still enjoys this relationship in his life. It is a blessing when your parents live to a ripe old age. Many are not so fortunate. Jim is so good to his Mom and to me too. I know he'll make it a nice day for us!


2. I am going to serve dinner in the dining room (we don't have to sit in the kitchen just because there are only three of us) and I am going to use my grandmother's china. That will be a reminder of all the lovely meals our family has eaten from them as we sat around the table together. My Grandmother and my Mom both loved these dishes and I do too!

I don't know how old they are but she has
been gone
for over 40 years.
I'd say they are at least 70 years old.

I was thinking about running out again to
get
some beautiful fresh flowers and suddenly...


Look what arrived on our doorstep from
Jennifer and Lowell and the girls a little later!
2 dozen beautiful roses. them!

3. I am going to go all out on the dinner. I just went and bought all the ingredients for my Mom's famous and delicious potato salad. I have never made it for just three people (it's usually 30!) but today I am.

This compote dish is just perfect
for our "crowd" tomorrow!


We're going to have a tri-tip roast and
sauteed mushrooms,

and artichokes and a
yummy green salad to go with it.


Mushrooms and garlic, a reminder of Jim's
Grandmother who was the best cook in the world.

And I am making my mom's wonderful peanut butter cookies, no body makes them like she did! They always remind me of her loving hands and nurturing ways. They'll be great with the chocolate ice cream that Jim's Mother loves so much.

I am going to serve the ice cream in these delicate,
pink, serbert glasses
that were my Mom's
and put some cookies in the little
saucer below it.

Warm and fresh from the oven!
{I know this over kill for 3 people but
I cannot make one batch of cookies.
Not when it is a once in every four year event.
I am serious. I have to figure out how
to use my mixer every time I take it out!}
Marie is probably hanging her head in shame for me!
4. I am going to try to talk to all the kids tomorrow but it may not happen as Chris is in Europe some place...I think Prague..with his engineering students. And with the time differences and church schedules it may be tough to get either of our European kidlets. If I don't I'll write them a letter letting them know that the best mother's day gift of all is being their mother. And the reality of that is that I celebrate them and motherhood every day of the year.

I am definitely going to talk to Missy and tell her how much we appreciate her as she supports Chris in his travels and is home alone with her four kids! And I am going to think of every beautiful baby that the Lord has blessed this family with! Pure joy each and every one of them.

This cute stork frame holds a photo of Julia
when she was born. It will represent all our
sweet babies as part of my
centerpiece on the table.

5. I am definitively thinking about and thankful for the sweet mothers of our grandchildren and what a super job they are doing in bringing up these little ones. They are tireless, unselfish, giving mothers and great wives. You go, sweet daughters, Jen, Laura and Missy! Sweet Melissa send me a gift certificate to Bath and Body Works and I plan to wear the beautiful bracelet that Laura send me from Rome all day tomorrow. And those roses, Jen! Yum! Thanks, kids, so much!

As soon as I got my mind off of what I didn't have (them nearby) and focused on what I do have (everything else) it made all the difference. And all that cooking helped too. Serving, keeping busy, and being thankful for the glass that is not only half full but overflowing... has turned my frown upside down.

Gratitude for our blessings from our Father in Heaven just makes us happy no matter what. That is one thing I know for sure. And service is the other. The love of a family trumps everything else. Time, space, distance can't touch it...it is forever. I am going to have a very Happy Mother's Day tomorrow, I hope you do too.

This is a perpetual Mother's Day card
from our kids. I take it out every year.
It is on a glitter board and
hangs with a ribbon.
It is made by Moonlight and RosesThey have great stuff!
The link

The topper of the day was seeing and listening to the Celine Dion's YouTube video! That totally kicked my melancholy mood to the curb! I had pre-posted it to post today at noon a few days ago. It is just below this post and I am putting on one more for tomorrow. It so totally expresses the beauty and love of a mother for her child.

I gave myself a gift today..I ordered that CD from Amazon! Am I the last person on the planet to get behind this album? I am kind of a recent fan of Celine Dion...she is so incredibly talented. I of course knew of her and some of her popular songs, I just kind of missed her until now if you know what I mean. So that was my day and my experiment on turning my day around. It worked...I am a believer!

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Happy Mother's Day


A Very Happy Mother's Day to one and all! Most women I have known, whether a mother or not, are to be celebrated for their bounteous, nurturing qualities. The love and joy that women bring into this world shapes and molds it like no other human force for good. Literally, the hands that rock the cradle bless us all.

Being loved unconditionally by my own mother was a very sacred experience, one like I have never known the likes of, until we had children of our own. I think most mothers would do anything for our children and in some cases have. Being mom to Jennifer, Christopher and Laura has been a priceless gift that never wears out or grows common place for me. They have taught me so much and given me so much love and respect and comfort through this life and I am grateful for them and their goodness.

They make every Mother's Day a Happy one for me. And now watching them raise their little families is even more thrilling. They work so hard and I feel exhausted just watching it.

I love you guys and your Dad for the many happy, happy years you can given me. You just keep getting better and better ~ you amaze us constantly.
Jen, Missy and Laura~Happy Mother's Day! You are the best!