Thursday, August 7, 2008

About This Nightmare I Had...

Every week for the past five or more years I have been meeting with dear friends once a week at 8:00 am sharp for some weight loss chatter and other girl time therapy in general. Well, the weight loss thing has been precarious at best, but the girl talk has saved my sanity more than once.

Every morning during the week I get up around 4:15 ~4:30 am with Jim, make his lunch, sit with him while he eats breakfast and we read scriptures together. I drag my rear out of bed, but he is so chipper and ready for the day that he throws all the doors and windows open to get the cool (still night time) air in the house, like Julie Andrews in The Sound of Music. Usually after he leaves I am wide awake so that is when I do a lot of my blogging. What the heck else is there to do at that time in the morning? This morning I was going in to make our bed and it was still dark and cold in the house and I took one look at the bed and thought...Hmmm, I'll just lie down for a minute or two and then I'll get up and get ready for my friends to come over.

Here is the account of what happened next from Connie's point of view. Her E-mail reads:

One of my Peeps

"Okay, I'm not going to forget this morning for quite some time.....If ever. :) First of all, it began on such a note of relaxed delight. Lanette and I chatting and happy on the doorstep. Then 2 rings of the bell without any response from within. Hmm. The van is in the driveway. The blinds in the bedroom are still closed. Hmmm. Concern, small but prickly, begins to surface. We walk around the side of the house. Oh, the blinds to the bedroom are open on this side.

And...My Other Peeper!

Lanette kind of halfheartedly leans in for a look. Then another look. I take a peek. We see the blanket encased shape of our dear friend. Hmmmmmm. The blanket is not breathing. Not even a little. That little prickly feeling becomes icky and bad. And bigger. Much, much bigger. So big that Lanette cannot simply try a friendly little tap on the window to test the Sleeping Beauty waters. Oh, no. She goes for the scared-friend stoccato bang Bang BANG. And that, my friend, is when we knew you were totally and perfectly okay. :) That was as impressive a resurrection as I have ever seen. I can only imagine that you're adrenaline was immediately on par with ours. Thank goodness Lanette softened it and soothed you by yelling through the window that we had thought you were dead. Not, 'We were in the neighborhood, there was a small, innocous bug on your window and we went to swat it away, inadvertantly tapping your window' etc., etc., Oh, no. She thought it better to holler that we had, in very deed, thought you were dead. I'm sure you just did what we told you at that point, "Go back to sleep, Bon!" Yes, I'm sure that you were relieved to know it was just us banging away on your window, screaming things about death, and leaving you to deal with your own adrenaline. We just didn't want to be the only ones walking away on shaky legs, I guess. Boy, what a relief. Good thing you were okay. We just could not imagine anything worse--oh, that is until Lanette said it would have been worse to find you bloody and bludgeoned. She has a point there.

Well, I just wanted you to know the whole story from our perspective. Oh my, I have been laughing about this all day long. What a way to start the day. I have learned a thing or two from this:

1) always sleep with my blinds tightly closed
2) if I do die in my sleep, first reach up and open the blinds
3) never be bludgeoned and bloody in front of my friends
4) if I wrap myself tightly in a blanket to sleep, make sure it still looks like I'm breathing
5) if I cannot follow the above principles, I may want to choose less invasive friends.
I guess it's true what they say--Friends don't let friends sleep in....Or something like that. :) Gosh, I just love you guys! We now have a new bond that will last throughout eternity.
You are all the BEST!!!!"

Here is what I think happened from my perspective: I had my first old lady experience with someone thinking...oh my gosh, where is she...she must be dead...let's go check! I had my first experience (hopefully) with peepers! I am thankful I was wearing my best nightgown and not just my undies, and I am glad the window was shut because I was probably snoring like a truck driver! But then they would have known I was still alive and probably wouldn't have scared the 'you know what' outta me. They were laughing so hard and I know it will be a long long time before I live this one down. And the lesson I learned is that is it is always the night, once a decade, when you forget to close your blinds that something like this happens~count on it! I am glad it was these Peeping Tommies and not someone else like the EMT squad! For that they would be dead meat! No Kidding! It is nice to be loved, however, some old ladies could lie there for a week before anyone noticed they were gone. Geesh though, a girl can't get away with anything anymore!


Bonnie said...

Lanette said, "Honestly I am laughing so hard I can hardly stay on my chair. Thanks for making our day Bonnie! Life is good!

By the way Connie - even if your blinds are tightly closed I will be forced to scream "Connie, are you dead in there?" Which will be remarkable since I'll have scaled the wall to the second floor - held on for dear life and banged on the window.....

Laura said...

THat is SOOOOO funny. I am glad that you were in a deep sleep and NOT----I don't think I even dare say it. Anyway, what a funny story. Too bad they hadn't brought a camera to take a picture---but I guess there was fear so there wouldn't have been any pics anyway.

girlsmama said...

He he he! That is pretty funny. So much for sleeping in!

Miss Jen said...

LOVE it! It is really sad when 8 AM is sleeping in though! You are a good woman to get up with a man that leaves the house so early!

Lanette said...

This will forever be one of my favorite moments in time. You just never know when life will give you a jewel - It made my day to know that Bonnie is alive and well!!